what God gave me today?

wHat God GavE mE tOday ?

Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Misery

What did I ever do to get all these treatment?
What did I ever say to be treated this way?

It sucks every time you try to pick yourself up, and the stone just comes rolling back down at you. After you have climbed up that steep hill, someone screams for help, you pause. You turn back to help that person, and you have to start all over again. Not only the person didn't say thank you, instead blame you for causing him/her to be delayed. What gratitude.

I so tired at times. Being nice to people is probably my nature. But being hurt in return is the last that I'd want to happen to me. I didn't say anything or do anything. All I did was to walk over, out of concern and puzzle, asked of how I could assist? Instead I got a cold shoulder right for almost more than a week. She used to be so fun and bubbly. Suddenly, she just became so mean. If only the uncle didn't put his phone on loud speaker I'd probably not be as hurt as now. Not blaming the uncle, but myself for paying so much attention. What hurt me most, the things she said were untrue. But what prove do I have to defend myself? Almost none. Some words can just be so blatantly pointed at you. Its easy for them to say it. But it really isn't easy for me to accept something that I'm not.

One moment she's so close to me. Next moment she treats me like as if I'm going to run away with her RM370. I really don't need this shit right now. A promise is promise. I said I'd pay you and I mean it. What good does it do you to go round chasing me for that small amount of money which means almost nothing to you? It'll only hurt people around you. Why am I being treated like a some liar?

These bad things just won't stop happening to me. As the more and more people of such surround me. Continuing to say mean things to me, treating me like a convict. Its not out of pure exaggeration, but from the bottom of my heart.

I'm really very tired of living as me. Sometimes I don't even want to wake up in the morning. Sometimes I even feel like getting run down by some accidental vehicle passing by. It'll probably clear all the hurts I have right now...

I wish I had a coma. I really wish I had it right now...

I really miss the people who used to be around.. I hope they are still around...cos I really miss them badly...

siaosiao @ 12:14 AM

Comments:

Pick yourself up, and keep walking with your head held high. I believe people that care are always around, supporting you :)

# posted by

GT : 11:17 PM

How are you so sure about that...

# posted by

siaosiao : 1:45 AM

I'm a bit of a skeptic last time about people that care are always around. Now I'm a believer after some valuable experiences I picked up not too long ago. Nobody can be sure what would happen tomorrow or even the next minute but one thing for sure, there are people around that really care! :)

# posted by

GT : 3:21 AM